Do you "should" all over yourself?

a child being scolded

Do you find yourself thinking, “I shouldn’t be doing this” all the time when you pick at your skin, pull out your hair, or bite your nails?Do you need to?  Those kind of thoughts imply guilt or lack on your part.  You are constantly making yourself wrong, or bad, or “less than” when you think (or say) “should” (or "shouldn't") thoughts.  And for what purpose?  "Should(n't)" thoughts are negative thoughts without which you would feel better.  And have you noticed that you pick, pull or bite less when you feel better?

So, train yourself to catch these thoughts.  Self-acceptance is a necessary step to healing.  Paradoxically, the tighter you hold on to believing that you shouldn’t be doing your BFRB (body-focused repetitive behavior), the less able you are to stop.  In order to change, we need to accept ourselves where we are.  That thought that you shouldn’t be picking your skin?  It is untrue, simply because you are picking your skin.  (Or hair, or nails, etc.) When we stop resisting reality, we release tremendous energy that was tied up, energy that becomes immediately available to help us make positive change.

Next time you are picking and saying to yourself, "I should stop doing this," see what happens if you say, "I could stop doing this."

Make more positive change - check out my coaching programs to help you stop skin picking, hair pulling and related behaviors.

Love and support,

Annette

p.s. Have you downloaded my free "Freedom Kit"? It comes with a written and audio report, "Why you pick your skin and how to finally stop," a video on "how to stop skin picking urges in two minutes flat," and my "Live Free" newsletter in your inbox each month. Learn more here.

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Does indecision make you pick or pull?

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Encouraging truths about stopping picking and similar behaviors